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narcissistic abuse recovery

Affirmations: The Cheesy Truth

Let’s talk reprogramming! After any less than desirable situation in life, we all need to become aware of our programming that could keep us stuck in this undesirable place. How does one go about reprogramming themselves? Well this was the question I was asking the universe when I committed to trying daily affirmations for a month. I had tried affirmations before, but never had I been so committed to repeating them regularly.

After a month of writing an index card with five affirmations every morning, I could feel the difference in the way I felt and the things that were happening/unfolding in my life. Suddenly, I had a sense of personal power in my life. I had discovered some sort of proof that I could put my hand on the steering wheel of destiny. This was a good feeling that I had only seen glimpses of before.

Affirmations are a tool to aide in helping anyone raise their vibration. There are so many tools/different directions that will get you to your desired destination. Try out as many different tools as you can, but do not bypass affirmations. They are simple, but there is  great power in simplicity.

Xoxo

ZiFi

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Tips To Rebuild Self Esteem After Narcissistic Abuse

After narcissistic abuse, we are left a shell of who we once were. Recovery is a time for rebuilding and remembering who we are and who we want to be. This is one of the largest parts of recovery, because often we did not even realize we lost part of ourselves until it was too late. The little pieces of our soul we gave away willingly to make other people happy add up and we are left with a hole in our hearts and souls. Rebuilding your self-esteem is an essential part of narcissistic abuse recovery.

Here are 16 tips to build self-esteem:

  1. Avoid negative self talk and stop the inner critic.
  2. Connect with people you love.
  3. Learn to be assertive.
  4. Take care of yourself-practice self-care.
  5. Be mindful.
  6. Change your story(your inner narrative).
  7. Exercise.
  8. Volunteer.
  9. Practice forgiveness with yourself and others.
  10. Use positive affirmations.
  11. Learn to accept compliments.
  12. Affirm your worth-make a list of your positive qualities.
  13. Practice gratitude.
  14. Be kinder to other people
  15. Try something new.
  16. Stop comparing yourself to others.

Xoxo

ZiFi

Connect with me:

Facebook https://www.facebook.com/ZiFiMedia/

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Do you have a question or a topic on narcissistic abuse you would like me to write about? Please comment here or email me at ContactZiFi@yahoo.com

Source:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/nurturing-self-compassion/201703/8-steps-improving-your-self-esteem

5 ways to build lasting self-esteem

How to Improve Your Self-Esteem: 12 Powerful Tips

Are You A Victim or Survivor After Narcissistic Abuse?

There are three main stages of narcissistic abuse recovery:  Victim, Survivor, and Thriver. Learning where you are in recovery can help you realize how much further you have to go in healing. We are all in recovery for life, but it is nice to know when to expect the Thriving stage to begin. Are you a victim or survivor?

Victim 

  • Facing horrific betrayal
  • Hurt
  • Confusion
  • Rejection
  • Denial
  • Shame
  • Anger at the narcissist
  • Abandonment
  • Loneliness
  • Angry at yourself for not knowing
  • Anger at yourself for time lost
  • Fear-what will I do now

Survivor

  • Not ready to forgive
  • Struggling to rebuild life
  • Getting counseling
  • Ready to be back to self
  • Trust issues still present
  • Learning self-care
  • Re-evaluating friendships
  • Anger is less, but still triggered
  • Hopeful
  • Trigger based depression
  • Learned self-soothing
  • Uncovered childhood trauma
  • Rebuilding life

Xoxo

ZiFi

Connect with me:

Facebook https://www.facebook.com/ZiFiMedia/

Instagram @Zifi-Writing

Do you have a question or a topic on narcissistic abuse you would like me to write about? Please comment here or email me at ContactZi@yahoo.com

Source:

Stages of Recovery after Narcissist Abuse

The Journey, Meredith Miller

11 Tips On How To Acknowledge The Truth & Forgive Yourself After Narcissistic Abuse

Realizing you were living in a fake reality is one of the hardest parts of recovering from Narcissistic abuse. No one wants to believe someone they loved would want to con them. However, this is the reality when it comes to narcissistic abuse. Narcissists are not capable of real love and so they use love as a weapon.

Here are 11 tips on how to acknowledge the truth and forgive yourself after narcissistic abuse:

  1. Realize this was not a real relationship.
  2. They controlled you to gain power.
  3. The Narc had complete cognitive knowledge of what they were doing.
  4. The abuse was a working mechanism that the Narc used to control you, manage you down, isolate you, disable you and use you to meet their needs.
  5. The why does not matter, you cannot fix a personality disordered person.
  6. Love was used to con you into the abuse by gaining your trust and commitment to them.
  7. Intellectually understand this is a personality disordered person.
  8. Emotionally realize this was Not Real love.
  9. Purge the negative messages that were planted in your head-these were only put there to control you.
  10. Take care of yourself-mentally and physically.
  11. You have the ability to achieve true happiness and the ability to love normally, the Narc does not have this option/ability.

Xoxo

ZiFi

Connect with me:

Facebook https://www.facebook.com/ZiFiMedia/

Instagram @Zifi-Writing

Do you have a question or a topic on narcissistic abuse you would like me to write about? Please comment here or email me at ContactZi@yahoo.com

Source:

https://afternarcissisticabuse.wordpress.com/

6 Tips For Setting Boundaries After Narcissistic Abuse

After experiencing narcissistic abuse, it is a great time to reexamine your boundaries. Are your boundaries healthy and are they working for you? Narcissistic abuse occurs most of the time, because of poor personal boundaries. If we had seen and paid attention to the red flags early on, we would not have taken the path to being in an intimate relationship with a cluster b personality disordered person.

Here are 6 tips to creating healthy boundaries:

  1. Reexamine your values.
  2. Get used to saying No.
  3. Look after your own needs and wants.
  4. You are NOT responsible for other people’s emotions.
  5. Follow through-claim your boundaries.
  6. Practice detachment.

Xoxo

ZiFi

Connect with me:

Facebook https://www.facebook.com/ZiFiMedia/

Instagram @Zifi-Writing

Do you have a question or a topic on narcissistic abuse you would like me to write about? Please comment here or email me at ContactZi@yahoo.com

Sources:

5 Ways to Start Setting Boundaries After Emotional Abuse

Setting BOUNDARIES

How to reclaim your boundaries after narcissistic abuse by using your values

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